Just put it down

I have seen this over and over and I must say something about it.  A family goes out for dinner.  Good right?  But wait, there's more.  Everyone has their cell phone out texting, or on Facebook, or checking e-mail or playing a game.  I recently saw a couple with a small child sitting across from each other, cell phones up, going through every app they have and ignoring each other and their child.  At another place I saw a family with guests with them, and everyone except the little kids, where on their cell phone without even looking at each other or talking, except when one of the kids annoyed the bigger kids or adults.  I have also seen college age people sitting at our dinner table more concerned about their phone then the company. 

What is so important that can't wait on our cell phone?  When did we lose the sense of community with each other?  How can we get to know someone when our eyes are fixed on our smart phone?  When we all had flip phones that only received calls, no one had that problem.  When the most asked question of your friends is  "Did you see (a certain post or video or news story)?", there is a problem.  How can we reach beyond ourselves when we are just wrapped up in our own world?

I am not asking these questions because I have never done this, I have.  I have learned to put down my phone and leave it alone when with my family and friends.  In fact, most of the time I have my phone on DO NOT DISTURB so that I am not tempted to look every 30 seconds at what is on it or if someone sent a message or the latest Facebook post.  In my opinion, if your friend can not wait (unless it is an emergency) then there is a problem with your relationship. 

Why not focus on each other's day or what is hurting them?  Why not look at them in the eye and talk heart to heart?  Why not try to get to know someone and not try and multitask on your phone and try and have dinner with those you say are important?  What you are really saying when you have your eyes and attention glued to the smart phone is that phone is more important that the people you are with.

My suggestion is this: Romans 12:10 Love one another with brotherly affection. Out do one another in showing honor.  When we pay more attention to our smart phone than the people we are with, who or what are we showing honor to?  The obvious answer is the smart phone (which has no personality, can't help us out of difficulties unless we are lost, cannot talk to us and get to know us, and will most definitely not last for a lifetime or eternity).  Learn how to honor those we care about by listening to them and giving them our attention.  It does not show that you honor someone by listening to them AND trying to catch up on what is happening on Facebook or Twitter. 

So I offer this challenge: take a month or a week and do not check Facebook from any device, designate certain times of the day to check text messages and emails, and the rest of the time devote to those you love and care about or call your friends.  I can guarantee it will not be easy because I have done it.  But hopefully you will find it as rewarding as I did and soon you too may be more concerned with relationships than an electronic device.